Every day of your life you are selling yourself, nothing happens until you’re successful at doing that.

We’re all in the selling business whether we like it or not. It doesn’t matter whether you’re a lawyer or an accountant, a manager or a politician, an engineer or a doctor.

We all spend a great deal of our time trying to persuade people to buy our product or service, accept our proposals or merely accept what we say.

Before you get better at persuading or influencing other people – you need to get better at self-motivation and selling yourself.

Here are 10 simple steps to self-motivation:

#1 – You must believe in the product

Selling yourself is pretty much like selling anything. Firstly, you need to believe in what you’re selling. That means believing in “you.” It’s about lots of positive self-talk and the right attitude.

The first thing people notice about you is your attitude. If you’re like most people then you’ll suffer from lack of confidence from time to time.

It really all comes down to how you talk to yourself. The majority of people are more likely to talk to themselves negatively than positively – this is what holds them back in life.

It isn’t just about a positive attitude; it’s about the right attitude – the quality of your thinking.

Successful people have a constructive and optimistic way of looking at themselves and their work. They have an attitude of calm, confident, positive self-expectation. They feel good about themselves and believe that everything they do will lead to their inevitable success.

If you’re in a sales job or a business owner or a manager then you need to continually work on your attitude. You need to listen to that little voice inside your head. Is it saying you’re on top, going for it and confident, or is it holding you back.

If you’re hearing – “I can’t do this or that” or “They won’t want to buy at the moment” or “We’re too expensive” then you’d better change your self-talk or change your job.

Start to believe in yourself and don’t let things that are out with your control effect your attitude.

Avoid criticising, condemning and complaining and start spreading a little happiness.

Remember the saying of Henry Ford, founder of the Ford Motor Company – “If you believe you can do a thing, or if you believe you can’t, in either case you’re probably right.”

#2 – The packaging must grab attention

Like any other product we buy, the way the product is packaged and presented will influence the customer’s decision to buy.

Everything about you needs to look good and you must dress appropriately for the occasion. And don’t think that just because your customer dresses casually, that they expect you to dress the same way.

The style and colour of the clothes you wear, your spectacles, shoes, briefcase, watch, the pen you use, all make a statement about you.

#3 – Smile

No need to get carried away, you don’t need a big cheesy grin, just a pleasant open face that doesn’t frighten people away.

#4 – Use names

Use the customers name as soon as you can but don’t over do it. Business is less formal nowadays however be careful of using first names initially. Make sure your customer knows yours and remembers it. You can do the old repeat trick -”My name is Bond, James Bond” or “My name is James, James Bond”

#5 – Watch the other person

What does their body language tell you? Are they comfortable with you or are they a bit nervous? Are they listening to you or are their eyes darting around the room. If they’re not comfortable and not listening then there’s no point telling them something important about your business.

Far better to make some small talk and more importantly -get then to talk about themselves.

It’s best to go on the assumption that in the first few minutes of meeting someone new, they won’t take in much of what you say. They’re too busy analysing all the visual data they’re taking in.

#6 – Listen and look like you’re listening.

Many people, particularly men, listen but don’t show that they’re listening. The other person can only go on what they see, not what’s going on inside your head. If they see a blank expression then they’ll assume you’re “out to lunch.”

The trick is to do all the active listening things such as nodding your head, the occasional “UH-HUH” and the occasional question.

#7 – Be interested.

If you want to be INTERESTING then be INTERESTED. This really is the most important thing you can do to be successful at selling yourself.

The majority of people are very concerned about their self-image. If they sense that you value them, that you feel that they’re important and worth listening to, then you effectively raise their self-image. If you can help people to like themselves then they’ll LOVE you.

Don’t fall into the trap of flattering the other person, because most people will see right through you and they won’t fall for it. Just show some genuine interest in the customer and their business and they’ll be much more receptive to what you say.

#8 – Talk positively.

Don’t say – “Isn’t it a horrible day” or “Business is pretty tough at present” or any thing else that pulls the conversation down. Say things like (and only the truth) – “I like the design of this office” or “I’ve heard some good reports about your new product.”

#9 – Mirror the other person

This doesn’t mean mimicking the other person, it just means you speaking and behaving in a manner that is similar to the customer.

For example, if your customer speaks slowly or quietly, then you speak slowly or quietly. Remember people like people who are like themselves.

#10 – Warm and friendly

If you look or sound stressed or aggressive then don’t be surprised if the other person gets defensive and less than willing to co-operate.

If you look and sound warm and friendly, then you’re more likely to get a positive response.

This isn’t about being all nicey-nicey. It’s about a pleasant open face or a warm tone over the telephone.

Before we can get down to the process of selling our product, our service or our ideas then we need to be as sure as we can be – that the customer has bought us and that we have their full attention.

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Life happens. It doesn?t matter how positive an attitude you have or how balanced and centered you are, there are going to be times when you are knocked down. Ties when your carefully organized life is turned upside down and you get knocked on your rear end. Life happens.

You will no doubt experience serious illness in either yourself or someone close to you. You may be challenged with the loss of a loved one, a divorce or perhaps the loss of a job or any number of situations that will leave you feeling like you were kicked in the stomach.

Let?s face it. These things will happen. They?re part of life and no matter how you try to explain them away with the idea that, “everything happens for a reason,” they hurt. A lot! They hurt at the very core of your being. The pain begins in your heart and radiates throughout your entire being. Repeating positive phrases does not make it stop hurting.

At times like these, you?re going to feel down, even depressed. You probably feel anger or some other manifestation of your pain. Whatever you?re feeling, it?s ok. It?s ok to feel hurt, sad, angry or whatever your true feelings are. You cannot deny pain any more than can deny fear. The only way through either of them is to give yourself permission to feel the feeling.

The question is not whether or not you will feel down. The question is for how ling will you stay in this state?

The difference between people who get through life?s challenging moments, regardless of the seriousness, and those who are immobilized by the events is what I call the “Bounce factor.”

How quickly can you bounce back? Of course, the severity of the event will have a lot to do with the time it will take you to get past the pain and on with your life.

Take the example of two people being downsized from their high technology jobs, something that is becoming a natural occurrence these days. One, whom we?ll call John, is floored by the news of his dismissal. He expresses his pain by becoming angry at the company, his co-workers and the system in general. He spends his days telling anyone who?ll listen, about his “problem.” Usually from a bar stool.

As he sees it, his life is ruined and he?s blaming everyone for his troubles. People who react like John spend weeks, even months, wallowing in despair until, if they?re fortunate, someone close to them convinces them to seek professional help.

Mary, on the other hand, reacts much differently. Although she has gone through the same experience as John and has pretty much the same issues like living expenses, etc., she chooses to react differently.

After a brief period of feeling a loss of self-esteem, self-pity and anger, Mary decides to get back in the game. She begins contacting her network of colleagues and co-workers, avails herself of the outplacement services her former employer offered everyone and starts actively looking for a new position. In a short time, Mary finds her “dream job” with an exciting new company.

While both people in our hypothetical example Had the same experience and both went through a period of hurting, the time each allowed themselves to remain in that dis-empowering state was vastly different. While John remained “stuck” in his problem, Mary handled her loss and moved on with her life.

This is the key. It?s not whether life occasionally puts you into a tailspin, it?s how long you remain there.

When something devastating happens to you, allow yourself some time to grieve your loss, however, don?t allow yourself to get stuck there. Take some action. Join a support group, talk about your feelings with a trusted friend or your spiritual advisor. If necessary, seek professional help.

In the case of a job loss, perhaps you want to take some time to re-evaluate your career goals. You may even consider a change in fields. When you?re ready, you can begin networking and making new contacts. Attend social or church events. Call people you know. Do something!

One of the most important things to remember in high stress situations is not to allow yourself to isolate. While spending some time alone is normal, even necessary, isolation can be dangerous and should be avoided at all costs. Get out and be with people as soon as possible. As a friend recently reminded me, “life is for the living.” It?s important to get back to your life. In time, the pain will pass.

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If you’re having trouble getting motivated to keep to your fitness program … or if you haven’t even got off the starting block yet, this article could change your life! Not completely … that would be too ambitious! But, there’s a tiny, inexpensive device that can provide you with all the motivation you need to get out and start moving your body around a bit more.

The pedometer, as it’s known, can also make you WANT to do it and can even get you to ENJOY doing it!

What … ? ENJOY exercising??? Surely some mistake?

Well, no actually. Please read on.

1. So, what is a pedometer?

It’s a small, compact device used for measuring the number of steps taken.

And, as well as measuring the number of steps taken when exercising in your local neighborhood, it can also measure your steps whilst you’re climbing the stairs, mowing the lawn, or doing the shopping.

2. How Does It Work?

It’s small enough to clip to your belt and is fitted with a pendulum which measures one step each time your foot makes contact with the ground.

3. How Much Does It Cost?

Many pedometers have been given away FREE as part of campaigns by local health authorities to get people moving their bodies more.

If you can’t find such a campaign in your area, you can buy a pedometer with a reasonable number of features for as little as $20.

4. What Exactly Does It Do?

You should buy a model which, at the very least, measures the number of steps taken, calories burned, distance walked, speed you’ve been walking and how long your routine has taken.

More expensive models may include any or all of the following additional features:

- a soothing voice to tell you how many steps you’ve taken
- a pulse monitor
- a stopwatch
- a radio and headphones so you can listen to your favorite radio station whilst out walking
- a step filter to achieve greater accuracy
- a back light so you can see your pedometer in the dark.

5. How Do I Set Up My Pedometer?

First you need to enter your height, weight and average stride length.

To arrive at your stride length, most instruction guides prompt you to measure out a distance of, say 10 meters, and to count the number of steps you take to cover it. Divide this number by the overall distance and this gives your average stride length.

Once it’s set up, just follow the instructions to activate the settings you want to use, clip your pedometer to your belt and you’re ready to go.

6. How Do I Take Readings?

At any point after you’ve started your routine, you can stop, flip open the pedometer and take a reading. Of course, you shouldn’t do this too often as this will interrupt the rhythm of your walk.

But you can get an idea of the progress you’re making by checking the number of steps taken, the distance you’ve traveled, the calories you’ve burned and so on. You’ll be able to go from one measurement to the next at the press of a button.

7. How Does This Provide Me More Motivation?

The great thing about wearing a pedometer is that you begin to think about the number of steps you’ve taken towards your daily target.

This gets you into a ‘walking mindset’ and you suddenly start to identify lots of new walking opportunities.

If you had to be dragged kicking and screaming to take up a fitness routine, the pedometer is the single most important device you can use to start enjoying your workouts.

It’s so easy to use and it can transform the way you feel about getting fit. It can take you from resisting the whole idea of doing a daily workout, to your really looking forward to it and wanting to do it more.

Why?

Because, after using it for a while, you begin to realize that your daily targets are not only achievable but, with a bit more effort, can be easily surpassed.

Something you thought was going to be such a grind becomes easy, because you know you can do it!

Did you ever think that was possible?

Well it is. Just get hold of your pedometer and keep wearing it. It can have a really positive effect on your fitness and health.

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Before I explain why a minute of Deliberate Attraction is better than none, I’d like to begin by giving a definition of The Law of Attraction.
Definition of the Law of Attraction: I attract to myself, whatever I give my focus, attention, or energy to; whether wanted or unwanted.
It is important to understand that The Law of Attraction operates in every moment. Right now, in this very moment, each of us is offering a vibration and The Law of Attraction is matching that vibration and giving us more of it; whether or not we are offering that vibration deliberately or non-deliberately. As the definition says, whether wanted or unwanted, we attract more of whatever vibration we offer in every moment. When it comes to our vibration, whether or not they are deliberately offered, or non-deliberately offered, and whether or not our vibration attracts to us something we want or don’t want, The Law of Attraction is still paying attention and operating in exactly the same way—in EVERY moment.
Ideally, we will want to become more deliberate offer-ers about the vibrations we offer. When we become deliberate about what we give our focus, attention, and energy to, we are practicing Deliberate Attraction! Here is an easy 4-stage cycle to help you understand why Deliberate Attraction is an important skill to practice.
Stage #1: You observe what you are attracting in any moment of your life.
Stage #2: While observing what you are attracting, you are offering a corresponding vibration.
Stage #3: Whether offered deliberately or non-deliberately, in every moment, The Law of Attraction is checking in with your vibration.
Stage #4: The Law of Attraction then gives you more of whatever you are offering vibrationally.
This 4-stage cycle keeps repeating itself over, and over and over again. This is how you manifest more of whatever you give your focus, attention, or energy to.
Notice the word ‘attention’ in our definition of The Law of Attraction. The more Deliberate Attention you give to something you desire, the more quickly it will manifest in your life. Imagine spending one minute deliberately placing your focus, attention, and energy on the way you want something to be in your life. You are filling that minute with deliberately offered vibrations. Your vibrations are summoning the energy of The Law of Attraction to start unfolding whatever you just gave your attention to.
Now that you understand, more clearly, the significance of being a deliberate offer-er of your vibration, isn’t one minute of deliberate attraction better than none? Remember, when you give attention to what you Do want, you are including it in your current vibration. And, when you give attention to what you DON’T want, you are including it in your current vibration. The Law of Attraction doesn’t make any distinctions between the two.
In closing, in every moment, including this moment RIGHT NOW, RIGHT NOW, RIGHT NOW, you are including both what you want and don’t want in your vibration. Practice becoming more deliberate in your vibration and you will manifest your desires more quickly. That’s what Deliberate Attraction is all about.

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A subscriber recently wrote to me: A friend of mine is on a fixed income and has maxed out his credit cards (nearing $10,000). He has started a new business, but currently has no customers or prospects.

He is affirming that he is already successful and debt-free. What is the best way for him? Should he write checks to pay his bills as they arrive, even though the money may not be in his account at the moment? Wouldn’t these concrete actions demonstrate his faith?My Answer: Faith is a wonderful thing – and very necessary. There are, however, approaches that may look like faith but lead us in risky directions.

Please tell your friend that he needs to pay close attention to “real” actions and concentrate on learning to provide a service to other people that they want. (Note the emphasis is on what “they” want.)

Paying bills with rubber checks isn’t an act of faith. It’s desperate gambling. I know from hard experience that it’s nearly impossible to get the right mindset for real faith or confidence when you’re circling the drain.

Your friend needs to get his feet firmly under himself with real money — even if he has to go tend bar or wash dishes for the extra income for a bit. Honest, it’s no disgrace (unless he stays there).

Remember that all faith needs feet. If you’re in an airplane on its way down in a power dive, you put on your parachute first. And THEN you do affirmations.

The old biblical phrase “faith without works is dead” means just that – belief needs to be connected organically with action. Productive action. If it’s not, then it’s not true belief, it’s only an attempt to con yourself and the gods.

Too many people hope that they can do affirmations or pray or ASSERT, and this will save them from having to make a decision and take action. But that’s not the way it works. Action and affirmations must be bonded together as a single unit and support each other like two legs. Neither faith nor action can stand alone.

So you might want to tell your friend that positive thinking is good (and absolutely necessary), but positive action is also an essential ingredient.

Simply put, he’ll never pray himself up a hill.

When he’s willing to take action, with all the stops out, his faith will bring the lucky breaks, the synchronicities, and the chance meetings with just the right people at the right times to help move him forward. But it’s the action that anchors all that potentiality into reality. ACTION.

Otherwise, it’s all vapor.

“Willing to take action with all the stops out” … some folks call that enthusiasm, others call it commitment. But it sure boosts the octane.

It’s often hard to get people to see that taking a detour on the way to their goals is not a “wrong turn.” It’s just another way of getting where they’re going. Whatever it takes.

Just remember that you don’t have to give up on your dreams and goals when some little thing comes along (or not so little). The goal is what’s important, not every little step it takes to get there (as long as we remember to TAKE the steps).

I’d guess that the old gremlin of impatience has killed more dreams than any other single influence. It’s so common to think, “If I’m not getting there RIGHT NOW, then that’s it; I’ll never make it.”

It might help to think of your vision of your future as a very penetrating stare. It penetrates anything that may seem to block your path. As long as you keep seeing what’s in your future, you won’t become stalled by the stuff that crops up in front of you today.

This may all sound trite, but it’s true, every bit of it. And I learned it all the absolutely hardest way. I lived through it over and over and over and…

But eventually, even a super-dense guy like me can learn, proving that anybody on earth can do it.

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A good motivation theory has to recognize the fact that we each get motivated differently. In the practice of neuro-linguistic programming or “NLP” this is taken into account in many ways. One of the more useful NLP theories is the concept of “away-from” and “towards” personalities.

Of course, we each have both modes of operation as a part of the way we function, but often one is dominant in each of us. Those in who the “towards” motivation dominates will be more affected by thoughts of future rewards. Those with a primarily “away-from” motivational style, will be more affected by thoughts of escaping pain or trouble.

Why not use this test to get an idea about which motivational style dominates your personality? Just read the following two descriptions of what having millions of dollars could mean to you.

1. You are safe and secure. You never have to return to your job or do anything you don’t want to do. You have the means to eliminate most of your problems easily. You have everything you need to be free and comfortable.

2. You have the house of your dreams, and your favorite car too. You buy anything you want for you and your friends, and you do what you want. You have the means to achieve any of your goals.

If the first description is more compelling to you, you primarily have an “away-from” personality. If you feel more motivated by the second description, you have a “towards” personality. There are good and bad points to both types. “Towards” individuals make good entrepreneurs, for example, but often get into trouble because they don’t plan well enough to avoid problems. “Away-from” individuals manage things well and avoid problems, but don’t do as well at big goals.

So how do you use this motivation theory and this knowledge about yourself to your best advantage? Suppose you want to make more money and you are an “towards” person. You would want to envision the things you’ll buy and do with that money, but also be aware that you may be glossing over the problems. If you are an “away-from” person, you’ll need to continually remind yourself what a mess it will be if you fail. Otherwise you’ll lose your motivation once you reach some level of comfort.

Of course, when you understand these two motivational styles, you can also influence others more easily. If you wanted to sell a new car to someone, for example, you would first determine if they are motivated away from things or towards things. For the former, you might explain how this new car will mean no more used-car hassles, or how it will make life easier. For the latter, you would explain how great they’ll look in it, or what it can do.

You can play with this theory, and practice using this knowledge to influence others, but don’t forget to influence yourself. While it is useful for understanding and influencing others, this is a motivation theory that is best used to affect your own self improvement.

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We all have habits, some good and some not so good. These are behaviors that we’ve learned and that occur almost automatically. And most of us have a habit we’d like to break, or one we’d like to develop.

For most people, it takes about four weeks for a new behavior to become routine, or habit. The following steps can make it easier to establish a new behavior pattern.

1. The first step is to set your goal. Especially when you are trying to stop or break a habit, you should try to phrase your goal as a positive statement. For example, instead of saying “I will quit snacking at night”, say “I will practice healthy eating habits”. You should also write down your goal. Commiting it to paper helps you to commit. It can also help if you tell your goal to someone you trust.

2. Decide on a replacement behavior. (If your goal is to develop a new habit then your replacement behavior will be the goal itself.) This step is very important when you are trying to break a habit. If you want to stop a behavior, you must have a superior behavior to put in it’s place. If you don’t, the old behavior pattern will return.

3. Learn and be aware of your triggers. Behavior patterns don’t exist independently. Often, one habit is associated with another part of your regular routine. For instance, in the snacking example the trigger may be late night television or reading. You automatically grab a bag of chips while you watch. Many people who smoke automatically light up after eating. Think about when and why you do the thing you want to quit.

4. Post reminders to yourself. You can do this by leaving yourself notes in the places where the behavior usually occurs. Or you can leave yourself a message on the mirror, refrigerator, computer monitor or some other place where you will see it regularly. You can also have a family member or co-worker use a particular phrase to remind you of your goal.

5. Get help and support from someone. This is kind of obvious. Any job is easier with help. It works even better if you can form a partnership with someone who shares the same goal.

6. Write daily affirmations. Write your phrase or sentence in the present tense (as if it were already happening), and write it ten times a day for twenty-one days. This process helps make your goal a part of your subconscious, which will not only remind you to practice the new behavior, but it also keeps you focused and motivated.

7. Reward yourself for making progress at set time intervals. Focus on your goal one day at a time, but give yourself a small treat at one, three and six months. The rewards don’t have to be big or expensive, and you should try to make it something that’s associated in some way with the goal. Doing this provides you with both incentive and extra motivation.
Following these steps is no guarantee of success of course. Depending on the habit it may take several tries to finally make the change. But if you stick with it, you can do it. Good Luck.

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Be careful what you believe because that is what you will experience. Your belief system is a mechanism which is uniquely yours. It is powered by your desire and controlled by your thoughts and actions. In other words, your success is measured by the strength of your belief.

What is it that you desire? Often people do not have a clue what it is they want, they just know what they do not want. Now is a good time to evaluate your goals and determine the end result you want to achieve. Put your goals in writing and place them where you can see them throughout the day. Read them frequently to keep them fresh on your mind.

? Be inquisitive. Research and learn as much as you can on how you can achieve your goal. Use all possible resources such as books, CDs, courses and people. Yes, people. Talk to as many people as possible who are already successful in what you want to achieve. Ask, ask and ask some more about what they did to reach success. Do not limit your contacts to only the people you already know. Introduce yourself by phone or mail, explain your purpose for contacting them and ask for a tip. The worst thing that can happen is that they ignore you. The best thing that can happen is that they become your mentor and offer support and encouragement. Chances are you will receive at least one great tip from many of the people you contact. This method is the least expensive and most rewarding.

? Be unique. Next, take the ideas you learn, embellish them and come up with your own creative process. Think of how you can approach your goal in a way that no one else has. Dare to be different. Don?t be afraid to take risks. What do you have to loose? Write out a list showing the worst things that could happen and then list all of the best possible outcomes. Always maintain your concentration on your desired result.

? Be better than your competition. When you were a child and saw your older siblings or friends riding a bike (without training wheels), you didn?t look at their scraped knees and elbows and say, ?Whoa, I could get hurt doing that.? Instead, you begged to try it for yourself. With a great deal of practice and often pain, you gradually learned how to maintain your balance. Before long you were trying to ?out do? your friends with your speed or fancy tricks. When you fell, you would get back on and try again with even greater determination. From your very first effort, you believed in your mind that if you got back on, you would eventually learn to ride. I bet you even knew in your mind you would be the best in the neighborhood, in your school, in the state, in the world!

? Be positive. If you see obstacles before you, then you will also only see problems. If you have hesitations that you plan will not work, then it will not work. If you are influenced by the power of negative people, then you will never be any better than they are. Believe in yourself and what you are capable of achieving.

When your desire to succeed is stronger than the pain, fear or frustration of failing, there is no turning back. I challenge you to view your goals just like you did when you were a child before you learned about self doubt and negative criticism. Remember, anything is possible as long as you believe. Make a commitment that you will not let anything or anyone, including yourself stand in your way of reaching your goals.

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